year of silver linings.
Updated: Feb 11
Time doesn't give us a moment to reflect, or a pause button to let us catch our breath. Some proof, this post is happening about a month late. However, the more I think about the year 2020 the more I needed this last month to process. Wrap my head around everything that was lost, but also the good.
2020 was a bitch. End of story.
A year of hardship, controversy and just shitty times. Yet here I am still able to find the good out of all that bad. That has to count for something, right?
CREATION OF NEW TIME
March 16, 2020 I was told the bar I worked at was going to shut down indefinitely. At that very moment all I could think of was "okay, let's get drunk, this is going to be a tomorrow problem." This was my mentality until it didn't really work anymore. It took months, a mental breakdown to one of my managers, and constant complaining about what to do. During this time of not working I spent more time with my family. Most of those times just being random dinner nights just to get out of the house. Once some restrictions were lifted, I found myself still ending up with family. Even if we had to quarantine separately and pick dinner up on the porch. Talk about doing thanksgiving differently. We started calling them our "covid dinners." Times that may have just been a few hours at a bar for dinner rather than a whole night of talking, games and drinking.
I started to make more cocktails. I work at a "beer bar" with 138 taps of all kinds of different beers/ciders. We have a full bar but the focus is obviously beer. Within the last year or two creating cocktails from the classics to more intricate drinks has become some what of a hobby. With the time, and not having to set an alarm clock, I was able to learn the basics as well as experiment. Something that now if I don't bring a cocktail to make at dinner, I get scolded.
STAYING IN THE LOOP
Not having the option about the amount of time off I was getting, I started watching more news. Paying attention to what was happening, hoping to find out when it would end. Hearing the horror stories from the news from all types of events this past year led me to make sure I was always educated. Between the protests, a pandemic and an election different from any other, I always want to be asking more questions, and trying to understand more about our government or the process, anything from local to federal. Not only did I learn to question but also to listen. Being a bartender I hear a lot, some truth, some bullshit and some in between. From the beginning of the political storm I question everything I believed was "right." Taking this chance to start over with a blank slate while constantly asking why. At the bar people avoid talking and challenging one another on their views with the fear it will result in never ending arguments. Hence, the cardinal rule to never talk politics at a bar. For me it often happens at home, and I'm sure it won't stop. However, challenging these conversations helped me learn about things I had never thought of. Most things I would never know about if I hadn't talked about it.
NO MORE EXCUSES
I have used the excuse "I'll start over on Monday" too often. I have already used it during this new year! After experiencing how much a year can take away so quickly, the line "ill start Monday" kind of scares me. The time off I was given because of the pandemic helped me avoid waiting till Monday. During all this times Monday started to fade away. If I didn't do it when I was thinking about it, then it didn't happen. I had no excuse, so if something didn't get done it was pure laziness. I wasn't even able to hide behind the excuse of work.
I have spent more time with my family, I have dialed back and started doing things for me that I always pushed off, I adopted a dog, I learned so much about what I want to be like as a member of society and just trying to be a good human. I have slowed my life down, loving the minute I am in as opposed to counting down the days till I fly off to my next vacation.
P.S. I have to admit though, I can't wait to travel again!